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Calgon! Take us away!

June 13, 2012 - Taste Buds
Remember those old commercials of a stressed out lady coming home after a long day, running a hot bath and then shouting, "Calgon! Take me away!"

Long gone are the days of Calgon, although bath salts have certainly been in the news lately. But these "bath salts" are not like Calgon. These are synthetic drugs that, when used, cause agitation, paranoia, hallucinations, chest pain and suicidal behavior. Then there are the eating side effects. No, not the kind of eating the Buds enjoy. We are talking about the folks who use bath salts who have either come down with flesh-eating disease or the folks who have actually eaten flesh off of other people.

On Google, if you start typing in the words "bath salts zombie" you immediately get a hit for "zombie apocalypse bath salts." Yes, it's come to this. Bath salts are being blamed for causing people such delusions that they are turning into cannibals -- kind of like how you'd expect zombies to behave. What's scarier is that in the first Florida attack, when police first approached the attacker, he reportedly "growled" at them and continued gnawing on his victim. One man supposedly under the influence of bath salts began chewing on the hood of a patrol car as police tried to detain him.

Earlier this year, a woman who injected bath salts in her arm with a needle developed flesh-eating disease that resulted in the loss of her entire arm and right breast. Doctors are unsure if the flesh-eating bacteria was on the needle or was in the bath salts she consumed.

In a story on the website Buzz Feed, a bath salt user said this about his (or her) experience: "I heard voices from my friend's room, which I strained to hear but couldn't quite make out. I convinced myself that they had been hiding in the wardrobe, and I wasn't invited. I started having auditory hallucinations, hearing the sound of wings flapping behind my head and high pitched voices." Another said, "I started having very vivid hallucinations of people being in my house who refused to leave. These people were characters from the TV show Oz, in particular Vern Schillinger and his son Hank..."

Perhaps this really might be the beginning of the end -- the zombie apocalypse, if you will. We don't understand why people just don't avoid the stuff, especially with all these horrific stories floating around the news now. The Buds prefer to report the news, not BE the news. We hope these bath salts go far, far away and never come back. In the meantime, we may seriously have to consider entering a "Run for your life" zombie 5K event...you know, to keep one step ahead of the zombies...just in case.

 
 

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