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There’s always room to add more love

May 8, 2011
By KAY SEDGMER - Times Leader Lifestyles Editor (ksedgmer@timesleaderonline.com) , Times Leader

HOW BIG is a mother's heart?

Well, it isn't the actual size of the heart that matters because, no matter what, the mom heart will always have just enough room to add one more love!

I recently read an article written by a woman in Alaska who thought she could never love anyone as much as she did her first born ... but that only lasted until the birth of her second child.

And, as life would have it, she went on to give birth to two more children who made their way into her already filled to overflowing heart.

About eight years after her last bundle of joy was added to the family she somehow found room for one more kid and she found she loved this one just as much as the other four.

Amazingly, she didn't give life to this child as she had those kiddos already in her heart. This one came by way of two family friends and an adoption agency in Bulgaria.

The author of the article, Heather Lende, was telling the story of the birth of her children. She smoothly added that fifth child into the story as having the "best birthday story" of all her children.

The lucky "baby" was eight years old when she was born into the Lende family at the urging of the family friends.

In the article, Lende said she had never imagined she would adopt a baby, let alone a "Bulgarian gypsy second-grader." However, that is exactly what happened.

Humorously, Lende said her friends made the suggestion because "they figured that since we had a family-friendly household, one more at the table wouldn't make much of a difference."

She also said her lumber-yard owning husband became interested in this little girl when he learned her favorite activity was construction.

"Finally, someone to take over the business," he said when approached with the possibility of adopting a child from a foreign orphanage.

After viewing a video of the young girl, filling out countless documents and more, the family of six upped their numbers to seven when they welcome the little gypsy to their home.

Now 20-years-old, the fifth child of the Lende family, is a psychology major minoring in music at the University of Alaska, Anchorage. She and one of her sisters are roommates.

"There is no occupancy limit on a mother's heart," Lende wrote. "It expands with each child."

I found this to be true not only with the birth (or, I'm sure the adoption) of a child but also with the addition of your child's spouse.

When you watch your first child walk down the aisle to say "I do" your heart instantly expands and welcomes the newest addition to the family.

I've found there is even more room in that four-chambered piece of muscle that pounds away in your chest keeping you up and running. And, if you think and new "daughter" or "son" is pretty special your heart will nearly explode when you first hear the words from the married "kids" of the approaching birth of a grandchild!

Yes, indeedy, the heart is ready to build an entire wing when a grandchild arrives.

It is the most marvelous thing to see your child become a parent and watch them fall in loveas you do the same.

And, you know you have a piece of heaven in your arms when you first hold that little grandbaby. It's just a hard thing to explain. You really love them "unconditionally" just like you did their parents, but the good things is ... you can spoil them and then SEND THEM HOME!

In all honesty, I have often wondered how we mothers do it. We see our children (and their children) at their worse. We have changed, and will change, some of the messiest pants in the world. We've found purple crayon drawings on our just painted walls. We've seen the results of a science experience gone wrong in our kitchen. We've watched a newly licensed driver head down the drive way in our cars. We've been told we just don't understand. We are (gasp!) not cool!

But we still love them. In fact we love them more with each tick of the clock!

Thankfully, God knew what he was doing when he made mothers and gave us that "mom" heart with an ability to "add room as needed."

Sedgmer may be reached at ksedgmer@timesleaderonline.com

 
 

 

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